Archive for July 2009

An Open Letter to Banana-Throwers   1 comment

Dear Sir,

When you pulled up in the parking lot, eating your banana, I was busy tying my shoes. You see, I was working up the energy to walk into the gym in front of all those people and just use the stupid machines already. Ahem. So, while tying and talking myself into the madness, I happened to watch you pull up in your very clean car, that has a street value of at least twice my crayon-colored, funky-smelling minivan. And I watched you throw your half-eaten banana onto the ground. TWO FEET FROM A TRASH CAN. I have to apologize for what happened next. I should have waited quietly in my car, you were nearly past it when I jumped out and asked you if you’d like me to pick up your banana. I should not have responded to your “But it’s biodegradable” comment, but I did anyway. You graciously conceded defeat when I mentioned how happy the bugs in the landfill will be, to feast upon this piece of organic treasure. Thank you for thanking me for picking up your trash.

Sincerely,

Definite Maybe

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Posted July 25, 2009 by comomma in Uncategorized

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